My life in a nutshell

This is the only way i can pour my heart out, cry till my eyes bleed and fucking write whatever i wanna write since i have no one close enough to tell my stories to & cause NO one knows about my blog.

Idk man. Kadang rasa cam im so dependent on others cam idk how to be happy by myself. I terlampau manja and need attention a lot. But sometimes i cam can stand by my own feet and do things by myself without asking for help from anyone. 

Im so jealous of seeing people with their bestfriends & shit. CUZ I FUCKING DOESNT HAVE ONE! Like literally one who knows every single motherfucking shit about me. 

When things fall apart idk to whom shall i seek advice & such..well everyone need someone right? Keeping things to myself has always been sucks!!!!!!!! 

When I need adib the most, masa tu lah nak gaduh masa tu lah nak ignore apa semua . 

HABISTU AKU NAK CERITA KAT SAPA?! 

Even the strongest fall down sometimes. I tried to stay strong but i just couldnt. Every inch cells in my body need him. I tried to ignore you. Its been 3 days or more idk. And the fact that ure not looking for me at all is just saddening. Its like i dont matter to u. Allah please grant me strength to go through this ignorance.  :( 

IM DONE

ITS NOT MY FUCKING FAULT FUCKING NOT. Why do i have to seek for apologies. Everysingletime. EVERYSINGLETIME MANNNN! I'm so tired of being ignored and get treated like shit. Seriously. Goodbye. If he really loves me he'll look for me. If he doesnt then i know where i stand. Ciao

Birthday sucks

My 19th birthday was sucks a lot. I spent the whole day in bed. And the only meal i had was maggi sedap for breakfast and nasi goreng kampung for dinner. I dont expect to have fancy celebration or whatever...but..naah nevermind...at at night time i had major breakdown :( i felt so lonely. But luckily i have adib to calm me down. Idk how my life would be if i ever lose him :'(